Queen Types

Okay. We've covered princess types. That's fine for bird and such. People? That's a whole other issue. Maybe it's because I was never anyone's "princess" when I was growing up. I was "little girl," "squirrel," and even occassionally "fart blossom," or "little shit." Never "princess." It wasn't that my family neglected to encourage my talents or emphasize my individuality, but I wasn't special like that.

So maybe I'm not much of a girl at all. My idea of a romantic movie is "Hellboy." I have never in almost eight years remembered my anniversary -- and I can almost guarantee it will give me the slip again this September. I've never been overly concerned with clothes, or makeup, or given to tears and emotional overtures. None of the examples set by the media, movies, and the culture in general apply to me.

Again, though, that statement will falsely characterize me. It isn't that I'm unemotional. I'm actually very much the opposite. But growing up, the standard that was set for me, by my Mom and the other women in my family, is that weeping doesn't get you anywhere. Generations of midwest farm wives are running around in my veins, and they didn't have time to get emotional or play around a subject rather than saying what they meant. They may have done "women's work," because of the time they lived in, but they also made sure that people got fed. Without "women's work" there would be no "work" at all.

I digress, as usual. Now that I'm in a permanent relationship (not married yet), I have in-laws who are strong, women, even if they are a little crazy. More women who just don't or won't be crammed into a stereotype. Women who watch movies with rubber monsters and big bugs. Women who work their asses off to keep things moving in a somewhat forward direction. Women who have seen and been through some shit and come out the other side.

This is what I have to live up to, and frankly, it's a more than a little daunting. Maybe I was never a "princess" because the women in my family never were -- they had the next step better -- they were queens. Matriarchs who stood in the center of everything, owning their situation. I didn't have time to be a princess because I was busy learning to be a queen.